what is love
???

idk, but here’s what i reckon


roses are red, violets aren’t really blue. they’re violet, literally a purple hue.
they lied to me and they lied to you, too. go figure.
pick the rose petals off until they’re all gone.
he never loved you to begin with.
you never loved you to begin with.
are you at the beginning or the end?
last one’s a rotten egg.


they say you can’t really love someone else until you love yourself first.
true and false.
some people love themselves through others.
some feel as though they don’t deserve love.
some don’t know what love is.
some love themselves and others, juggling emotions well enough to join a circus. 

i love myself but not that much…just enough to get by.
fill the tank with juuust enough gas to get to the next destination.
or is this the final destination?
empty again, sad.
fill up some more,
happy?
don’t forget to smile because smiles are happy and love is happy, right?
so happy.
so happy.
so happy.
so happy.
practice self-care if you care enough—do some yoga, eat fruit, set boundaries, draw, detox, masturbate, meditate, exercise, read a book, etcetera.

careful.

self-care can turn into self-love or self-sabotage. sabotaging other relationships for the sake of your own. but it’s okay you didn’t love them anyway. 


what is love?

it’s sugar and spice and everything nice. it’s rainbows and butterflies and is supposed last forever. if it doesn’t, simply turn it off and then on again…or put it in rice, hang it out to dry… return it and get your money back as a last resort.
that should do the trick.
that should do the trick.
that should do the trick.

love is UNPREDICTABLE. it’s the jump scare of all jump scares. red on the inside. calm down a little. now it’s blue…’er, violet. if it can turn caterpillars into butterflies, it can turn skeptics into believers. 

i’ve never been in love with anyone, including myself. love requires time, patience, persistence, gratitude, wisdom, understanding, etcetera.
yikes..
i’m definitely not qualified.
i’m certainly not certified.
an entry-level situationship should do the trick.
practice makes perfect anyway, right?
wrong.

i’ve cried myself to sleep more times than i can count. cried last night actually—snot on my pillow, face raw, eyes swollen as i type this. a cold spoon should do the trick.
ugh.
crying helps. crying is release. release is starting over. having the strength to start over is self-love.

he loves me, he loves me not.
i love me, i love me not.
i’m running out of petals, time for a new bouquet again…maybe tulips this time.

i’m in love with the idea of love.
ideas are fun!!
Fun
FUN
fUn
fun!
ideas are cool.
ideas are fresh.
ideas are snazzy.
there are no wrong ideas. only wrong opinions. it’s best to keep opinions to yourself though because no one asked.
the idea of love holds so much potential, so much hope, so much excitement!! but idea is only safe in your head. the moment you let it out, it runs really fast and might not come back exactly the way you wanted it to or even at all.
before you know it, fantasies turn into daydreams,
daydreams turn into inflated expectations,
inflated expectations turn into false realities,
false realities turn into heartbreak.

“careful”
falling for potential can feel a lot like falling off a cliff.
“i love you”
…“i love you too”
actually, i love the idea of you.
good game though.
better luck next time.
better luck next time.
better luck next time.

X

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